If you had unlimited amounts of money, what would you do with it?

There are so many people worldwide that have unlimited amounts of money. Some of them keep it in the bank to continue making money on the money. Some use it to send care packages to less fortunate countries. Some squander it on useless objects that need to be dusted regularly. I am not one of those fortunate people. 

I remember when I was with Douche-bag, I had wanted to get a large boat. We were going to sail the ocean, living off the sea, and growing a small garden on board. Realistically, I don't think I would last very long at sea. I mean, I don't eat fish for one thing. Second, I don't know how to keep a garden at sea. Third, I don't know if I have sea legs. I've never even been on a cruise ship!

I know I would buy a house. That would be the first thing I would buy. Nothing extravagant, of course, just a simple house with a few bedrooms. Maybe a pool in the backyard. Then I would need a new car. The one I have now is fine, but it has a lot of problems. I call it "The Curse of The Douche-bag". I am constantly taking it in for repairs. I think I would like to buy one of those new hybrids.

I have a huge family, and since I'm thinking "unlimited resources", I'd buy a mansion. Not to live in all the time, just like a summer home. With separate wings for each family member, that way the fighting is to a minimum. With a mansion, I think I would need a crew to work there. Someone to clean, mow, etc. That way I would also be providing job opportunities to others.

I would love to travel, too. I have only been out of the country once, and that was to Cancun, Mexico. That was another one of the best times of my life! This guy I was dating took me there and gave me a native perspective of his hometown. We stayed inland, ate at the local places, had fresh ceviche on the beach. It was wonderful! I would love to go back. Then, I would go visit Iceland. I did a research paper on the country of Iceland when I was in grade school, and fell in love with the country. After Iceland, I would tour Europe, then Australia, then Brazil. I would travel the entire planet, taking in the beautiful sites that each city has to offer. Maybe I could even squeeze in a cruise or two.

One of my passions in life is mental health. So after all my traveling, I think I would try to implement a better mental health care system. I would start local, but would love to see something global. With unlimited resources, I'm sure I could do it. Since I'm being philanthropic, I would start a college scholarship. Tuition is becoming so unaffordable, it seems like the right thing to do.

I suppose for now I will just have to continue to live within my means. Provide a good and stable life for my daughter. Drive "The Curse" around. And just hope one day I can buy a simple house with a few bedrooms.

Next time: Preparation for the Future!      

Where did my sweet little baby go? And who replaced her with this dirty, smart mouthed kid?

July of 2007 my sweet little angel was born. She was a pretty big baby, weighing in at 8lbs 13oz, and had a beautiful head of black hair. Fast forward 4 years, and now I have a midget nazi on my hands dictating the house. She's about 3 1/2 feet of crazy! She doesn't say please and thank you unless I repeatedly remind her. She's dirty! Like dirt under her fingernails and toenails! She hardly ever goes outside; where is the dirt coming from?!?! Her hair looks like she is a homeless orphan. Just wild and crazy looking, and that's after it's brushed! She snores in her sleep like a baby gorilla! So much for Claratin! Her feet stink. OMG I take her socks off and am momentarily reminded of port a potties! She never cleans up after herself. She rams her head into my stomach and punches at me when I pick her up from school, as if that is our official handshake. She whines! Oh God does she whine, and the pitch keeps getting higher and higher. She wants and wants and wants! She jumps on all the furniture even though she has a perfectly good trampoline that she could use. She can scream until she turns blue, and that is just for fun! When she's angry she stomps her feet and growls. She throws around the word fat too much, and teases her baby cousin. She steals toys from her and yells "no, mine"! She hardly eats her dinner anymore, I'm thinking a growth spurt is in our future.

At night when she is sleeping, she has horrible night terrors. I scoop her up into my arms and repeatedly reassure her that I am her mommy because she is still asleep and can't see me even though her eyes are open. I rock her back and forth until she has calmed down and can peacefully go back to sleep. And that when I see my sweet little angel never left in the first place.

Next time: If you had unlimited amounts of money, what would you do with it?     

Dreams

I have the weirdest dreams sometimes. In the one last night I was this vampire thing. It was like a cross between a vampire and one of those natives from the movie Avatar. I had vampire teeth and strength, but a weird tail that also sucked blood. My clan of vampires were fighting other clans of vampires in a school gymnasium. Like I said, they are pretty weird.

The dreams that are my favorite is when I'm with "him". I don't know who he is or what he looks like, but he shows up every now and then. When he is in my dream I am calm. It feels as if I've known him for a long time. I always know it's him because I rest my head on his chest and tell him I can hear his heartbeat. That happens in every dream with him regardless if we are vampires, or ghost hunters, or whatever other scenario my imagination can create for us to be in. When I wake up from those dreams, I am saddened that he is gone again. And I don't know when I will see him again. It's like I'm having a love affair with my subconscious. Boy, my psychiatrist is gonna have a field day with that one!

My other dreams that I enjoy are the ones in which I can fly. Once I realize I'm in a dream I make more of an effort to fly farther and faster. These are the same dreams in which streets are bouncy because I have not quite figured out how to land. In one of my flying dreams, I was down the street from my Aunt's house and I kept trying to turn down her street but the street was blocked by a wall. I knew I had to fly over the wall to get to her house, but once I realized I could fly I got lost in a maze of houses.

When I was a child I would have dreams that repeated. There was the one about my invisible friend, Ugly-Boy, and we had to rescue one of his friends from Dracula's Castle. Oddly enough, the entrance into Ugly-Boy's world was through my pantry in the kitchen. We always won, but I continued to have that same exact dream for years. Another reoccurring dream was one where I would be in my cousin's house and their second floor had been transferred into a pirate ship. There were hammocks, planks to walk on, and different sort of hidey holes everywhere. My cousin got a kick out of that when I told her about it.

The worst dreams are the ones where I am back in high school. I can't remember where my locker is, and my class schedule is in it. Once I find my locker, I can't remember the combination. Sometimes I give up and try to remember what class I should be in. Usually I'm wrong. Every time I go to my math class, my teacher asks me where I have been and do I know that I have a lot of make up work to do. That's when I leave and go to Science. Then the bell rings and I'm trying to find my locker again. And I'm running late for my bus. By the time I find my locker again, my bus is gone, there is no one I know in the parking lot, my car isn't there and so I have to walk home. I suppose it isn't that bad as long as it turns into a flying dream. 

Part of me wishes that some things in my dreams were real. Like flying, being a hero, finding "him" whoever he is. But the other part of me is happy that high school is over and I only have to relive in my dreams. I wonder what I'll be dreaming about tonight . . . . .

P.S. If any of my readers would like to share with me their crazy dreams, I'd love to read them. Just leave me a comment!

Next Time: Where did my sweet little baby go? And who replaced her with this dirty, smart mouthed kid?     

How many medications can one person possibly take?!?!?

Sometimes I am surprised at the amount for prescribed medications that I take. It's actually pretty funny to see the look on someone else's face when they see me take out all my bottles of medicine. There are meds for the morning and meds for night. Meds for my tummy, meds for my pain, meds for my anger. Meds meds meds!

 

It starts in the morning with an over the counter (OTC) and 3 prescription pills. Migrelief is an herbal medication that I take on the advise of my doctor to decrease the intensity and duration of my migraines. Cimetidine is for my acid reflux. Venlafaxine is for my anger. Metoprolol is a beta blocker to decrease my heart rate. That one is a new med so I'm still not 100% what it's for but I'm taking it.

 

Then at night, I take one OTC and 5 to 7 prescription pills. Another Migrelief and Cimetidine because they should be taken 2 times a day. Ambien to help me sleep. Tramadol (2 pills) for my shoulder pain. Reclipsen to bring on my period because of the PCOS. If I still can't sleep then I take a Benadryl. If I have additional pain that my Tramadol can't handle, I take Diclofenac Sodium which is a type of non-steroidal anti-inflammatory drug (NSAID).

 

Let's say that despite taking Migrelief every day twice a day, I still get a migraine. Then I have an additional pill that I take. My old pills were AWESOME!! I took 1-4 through the day and the migraine was gone. However, the drug companies no longer make that prescription so now I have been put on something that doesn't even have a name, it's just a bunch of abbreviations. It's called butal-asa-caf. I don't think I'm even supposed to take anything with aspirin in it because of my stomach. When the monthly pains start, and they are never bad enough to warrant Narcos, I take Tylenol. I love Tylenol! Is that ok to have a love relationship with Tylenol? In fact, TYLENOL IF YOU ARE LISTENING: please bring back your children's line of medicines especially the melt-away tabs. I read the instructions and do not overmedicate my child, so if you want to just send me a shipment alone for my child that would be great! OR just start selling them again!

 

When the pain in my shoulder is just too too much to handle, then the valium comes out. No pain after that. Then there is something wrong with my rib cage. Medication didn't work, but medicated pads did, so when that pain flares up I slap on a pad. I feel like a walking pharmacy!

 

And that is just what I take! My poor kid already has to take Claritin everyday or risk going to an Ear Nose and Throat Doctor for a potential operation. Then there is my supply of Tylenol for her that is the last of the two bottles that I ever found, and are not expired. SERIOUSLY TYLENOL BRING THEM BACK!

 

So I guess it's really not that many medications, but when you compare them to a normal person's medicine cabinet it looks extreme. And then none of them get filled at the same time, so I'm at CVS every few days. Anyway, I'm up late tonight, looks like it's gonna be a benadryl night.

 

Next time: Dreams         

My head is spinning faster than the exorcist!

It's that time of the year where I start to get a little crazier than usual. It starts with Halloween and doesn't end until the New Year. . . Holiday Season!! I try to do all of my shopping well before Christmas, but still, there is cooking, wrapping, planning, etc. I have already bought G 4 presents and that was WAY before Halloween. Not that it is a holiday, but my birthday falls around this time of year too. I used to get really excited about it, now I dread it's arrival. Older and older I get. The planning has already started. Where are we going? Who is going? Are we going to dinner before we go clubbing? What are you wearing? What am I wearing? Are we getting a table?

Then comes Thanksgiving. Who's making what? Where are we eating? Who's coming? What time is dinner? How many things do I cook? Do I make just a dessert? Does everyone like the green bean casserole that I make EVERY year? If they don't, why are they eating it all? Do I try another random dessert that could potentially be a success or go down in a ball of flames? Remember the Creme Brulee? What a clusterf*&k that turned out to be! What is G wearing to dinner? What am I wearing to dinner? Is it possible to sweat this much in WINTER!

Then it's a brief few weeks of what seems to be relaxation but it is really the countdown to the ultimate crazyfest! CHRISTMAS! How long does it take to put up one tree? Do we want to put up two trees? Are all the presents wrapped? Did I find all the presents that I hid? Where are we going for Christmas Eve? Where are we going for Christmas? What are we eating Christmas Eve? What are we eating for Christmas? Do I have to make something? What am I going to make? Do people eat green bean casserole for two holidays in a row? What is G wearing? What am I wearing? Are we going to mass? Which mass are we going to? Is G gonna like all her presents? Did I buy her enough presents? Did anyone make cookies for Santa's plate? Do we have a carrot for the reindeer? Don't forget he glass of milk. Can I get to bed before 4am? Are we arguing in front of everyone this year, or just family? Who's talking to who? Who's not talking to who? Why do we have to watch sports AGAIN?

Sometimes I think my friends do it the best. The only thing we plan is when the day is that we celebrate Friends Christmas. I cook the meal. The kids sit and eat. The adults get tipsy. We exchange gifts, and the kids play with their new toys. Then it's home in bed. Simple and enjoyable.

New Year's is relatively low key, except it is minimally stressful. Where are we going? Did we get VIP? How dressed up are we getting? Can we afford to go there? What are you wearing? What am I wearing? Is there a cover? Are we sure we want to go there? Isn't there somewhere more relaxed?

Thank God there is 4 months till Easter!

Next time: How many medications can one person possibly take?!?!?     

I might have to get on my SOAPBOX

There are not very many things I get huffy about, but I recently found out that my satellite provider will no longer be airing any Fox or Fox affiliated channels. Normally I'd be like "big deal, not like I watch that anyway", but it is a big deal. This Tuesday, November 1st, I will no longer be able to watch American Horror Story on FX. Then, later in the year, local fox channels will be taken off the air. That means no Bones, House, Terra Nova, and Fringe on Fox, and no shows from UPN. I am not very happy about this. Granted I primarily watch CBS because "CBS cares", but I DO watch all those other listed shows. Well not House so much, I really don't like what his character has become.

Anyway, please feel free to go to these websites and decide for yourself who is telling the truth.

Direct TV: http://www.ourpromisetoyou.com/?

NewsCorp/Fox: http://keepmynets.com/

I don't know what exactly will happen on November 1st, but at this time where our country is in a recession, do companies really think they have the right to ask for more money for the same product? It's not fair to us, the common folk that just want to enjoy a little television after the little people stop running around screaming! (You know who I mean) 

Addendum: As of today (11/2/11) FX is reporting that Direct TV and NewsCorp/Fox have come to an agreement and will not be going off the air. Yay!

Next week: My head is spinning faster than the exorcist! 

Cheese Puffs VS Cheetos

How do you buy snack foods for a kid that likes Cheetos, when you prefer Cheese Puffs? I thought I raised her better to enjoy the puffy quality of a cheesey snack food rather than the roughness of the oddly shaped cheeto. Either way we both enjoy licking that cheesey build up that forms on your fingers after eating half a bag (ok a whole bag). I feel almost offended every time she asks me to buy her a bag of Cheetos. I came real close to asking her if she wanted a bag of funions instead, but I held my tongue.

It definitely is in the raising because I don't remember ever truly like Cheetos. I mean, don't get me wrong, if they are at a party and no one brought Cheese Puffs, then I'm going to eat them, but I won't enjoy them. There is something about them I don't like. Whether it's the weird individualized shape of each one, or how hard they are, or that it seems like you just don't get as many in a bag as you would of Cheese Puffs, I can't really say where my dislike comes from.

The Cheese Puff, on the other hand, is about as enjoyable as you can get before a sugary sweet. They all come in the same basic shape. This is important so that you don't have to fight anyone for the biggest Cheese Puff in the bowl. They are all the same size; can't say that for Cheetos. Also, they melt in your mouth. There is really something to be said about sucking the air out of a food until it slowly gets dissolved in your mouth. Also can not be done with a Cheeto.

The company that makes these deliciously fine snack foods have, in the last few years, tried to expand on the idea by creating the Chester Cheetah Paw, which is puffish, but not. It does not compare in my book. The Cheese Balls are great too, but I find that somehow after eating them I notice a layer of skin has been grated off the roof of my mouth. They also make the Twists, which are giant versions of the Cheese Puff, but twisted, hence the name. These are a bit too large. I like a snack food I can toss in my mouth and chew, not take a bite of and still have half the food left to eat.

Now back to the root of the story. I don't want to be one of those people that buys a giant bag of Cheetos AND a giant bag of Cheese Puffs. If they could create some sort of combo bag, that would be great! I could split the bag with G and there would be no complaining from either of us. Just two big girls, sitting on a couch, licking the cheesy residue off our fingers. Pure Bliss!

Next time: I might have to get on my SOAPBOX